Audit

borednbuzzed.com

The one thing to read first: this site is a client-rendered React SPA

• The no-JS on-page crawl sees 0 links, 0 images, 0 words, no <h1> — because it never ran the JavaScript that builds the page. This is not a report that the page is empty; it is the known limit of the thin/no-JS plan requested. A real content audit needs a JS-rendering crawl (paid, costs more per page).
• Lighthouse (PageSpeed Insights) DOES run real Chrome and DOES execute the JavaScript, so its speed numbers below are trustworthy for what a visitor actually sees.

Speed — Lighthouse / PageSpeed Insights

Mobile LCP is the one real speed problem, and it is not a server or bundle-size problem — the server answers in 0 ms and the page is only 1.2 MB total. The 8.1-second wait is the SPA pattern itself: on a throttled mobile connection, the visitor sees a blank page until the JS bundle downloads, parses, and React paints the content. Desktop does not show this because Lighthouse desktop assumes a fast connection.

Fix: prerender or server-render at least the above-the-fold hero (a static HTML shell Google and mobile visitors see immediately, before React hydrates) — this is a build change, not a hosting change, since Vercel itself responds instantly.

On-page scan — what happened, and what tripped

Every one of the 16 known routes was crawled as its own thin, no-JavaScript page — not one homepage scan. All 16 returned HTTP 200 (ok). Zero were broken and zero redirected.

• Title (all 16 pages, pre-JS): “Bored ‘N Buzzed Cannabis — Kirkland, WA” (39 chars — fine on its own, but identical everywhere)
• Meta description (all 16 pages, pre-JS): “Bored N Buzzed Cannabis — Premium cannabis dispensary in Kirkland, WA. Come bored. Get buzzed.” (94 chars)
• No <meta name="robots"> conflicts, canonical present, HTTPS, valid HTML5 doctype, on every page
• duplicate_tags check errored (API needs a type param on this account) — harmless; the identical-shell finding above already covers what that check would have flagged

Analytics

Menu, POS & product content

Checked against the client's own Marketing Manager job posting. Every item below is a fact about the current site, confirmed in its own live menu feed — not a guess.

• No Weedmaps or Leafly links found anywhere on the site — checked the full site and the live homepage. The job posting names updating both as a task; both listings already exist and are active (see Reviews below), the site just never points a visitor toward them.
• 475 of 1,158 products (41%) are marked doh_compliant: false in the feed's own data. What this flag controls is a WSLCB/DOH question for the client — noted here as a fact to ask about, not a claim of a violation.

Reviews & social

• Strong reviews, invisible on the site. Yelp lists the business at 4.8/5 from 189 reviews; Leafly and other cannabis directories list it separately, one at 4.9/5 from 123+ reviews. None of this appears anywhere on borednbuzzed.com — no review widget, no star rating, no link to either platform.
• Social links confirmed live: Instagram (instagram.com/bnbkirkland_) and Twitter/X (twitter.com/borednbuzzed), both in the footer on every page.
• No TikTok link exists. “TikTok” appears only in marketing copy describing what the brand does elsewhere — not a link to an account on this site.
• No push notifications or SMS. Checked all four JS bundles for a service worker and the Notification API — neither is present. The Rewards page mentions “early drop notifications” as a benefit of joining, but no working notification mechanism exists in the code today.

Age gate

Every page carries the required text disclaimer site-wide, in the footer, not only in a one-time pop-up: “Must be 21+ to purchase. For use only where legal. Keep out of reach of children.” That part is confirmed correct.

Site health

• ✗
  No sitemap.xml. Confirmed two ways: DataForSEO's own site-wide check (sitemap: false) and a direct fetch — /sitemap.xml returns HTTP 200 but the body is the React app shell, not a real sitemap.
• ✗
  No robots.txt either. Same symptom — /robots.txt returns 200 with the SPA shell, not a robots file.
• ✓
  SSL valid — wildcard cert (*.borednbuzzed.com) from Let's Encrypt, expires 2026-09-18. Auto-renews if Vercel manages it (it almost certainly does).
• ✓
  Redirects working — http:// → https:// (308) and bare borednbuzzed.com → www. (308) both correct, no duplicate-content risk.
• ✓
  Hosting: Vercel — healthy — IP 216.198.79.1, HTTP/2, HSTS enabled (max-age=63072000), fast edge response (X-Vercel-Cache: HIT). No CMS detected.

Fonts in use

Six font families load across two paths — the HTML <head> link and a separate @import inside the compiled CSS bundle. Luckiest Guy is the site's primary display font, the default for every <h1>–<h6> and all three button styles.

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